oh what to do, what to doooo...

rights about now i feel like fixing the scratches on my copy of Knights of the Old Republic and actually getting past the first level, specially since i have a wireless mouse now, and i really need to send Aliza some of my pics. now that i have a digital camera, and i sortof want to beat that level of Metal Gear Solid 3 that i started, since i got my new gamer's chair (which i must say is wicked awesome, 2 four inch speakers right next to my head, bass and rumble in the seat so i can feel the gunshots, and so comfortable for long gaming excursions. and yet here i am with nothing to do and noone to do it with, which brings up another topic, i want to go on a roadtrip, or take a vacation, or even a sabaticle, just cuz it sounds cool, but to go somewhere cool and exciting, without, eh... most of the family, or maybe some friends, and specially with me girlfriend, to somewhere, for more than a day or two, cuz thats never enough, and nowhere that has anything to do with work, because everything seems tied back to that somehow, like the trip to Illinois a couple years ago, which just happened to double as a buisness trip to a furniture distributor. Europe, thats it, i'll go to europe, visit Ireland because its that darn cool, and Scotland for the bagpipes, and Wales cuz it has a funny name, (is Wales a separate country from England, i dunno?) and then England to see all that, and the silly unmoving cliche guards with the funny hats that keeps them from getting gobbled up by Big Notsofriendly Giants (they taste like hats) and to just walk through the country side on a quaint little dirt road, climb through a hedgerow and get kidnapped by crazy scientists and ride in a big steel ball to mars and back again... meet Deemers at last, btw, if you ever read this Deemers, i have been having difficulty emailing you, did you change your address? drop me a line. anyway, i need a change... meet Cristopher Loyd maybe, if he's still alive, or Hugh Laurie, watch a race and see what all the fuss is about driving in circles :) or just hang out with somebody i've never met before and never will again, that would be cool, if the guy was cool too. man, this is a long post. freedom, theres the word, you know, i was in Gamestop buying forementioned Metal Gear Solid game and it is rated M (17 yrs. +) so i go to the counter and the guy asks for some ID and Melissa whips out her drivers license with a flourish (okay, thats just in my mind but thats beside the point) before i could i could get my permit out, so i ask the guy if a non photo permit would have worked anyway since it does have my date of birth on it, and he says yes, but wait he'll ask, and the shift manager says maybe, since it is state issue, but then again maybe not... so it's left undecided and Melissa insists that it's a negative, but i still feel like i'm oh so close to the littlest bit of freedom, but just that little bit too far away for it to really count, and i can't get my drivers license if i can't pay for my insurance, and i can't pay for my insurance without an actual job, and i can't get a real job with every other bit of my freetime spent at the store, and i can't get the cushy job right next door that i wanted because i hesitated during the summer because it was a night job and the store is a mostly day job that laps over into a night job with suprising frequency, and this hesitation left the job open for my cousin to take, and a friend to get the next dibs in. and now i'm falling apart, my ankles sore from who knows what, there's something going on with my hip that is disturbing and seems like it makes my leg start to cramp up when i try to move differently than normal, the left part of my jaw sortof tightens up sometimes, i have a big bump/bruiselike thing on my right shin from two and a half weeks ago when me and Tyler Clark kicked each other in gym, and i'll probably paralyse myself sometime soon because i've taken the habit of cracking my neck... and i'm 17. i sound like my grandpa. i don't know, well i guess thats enough complaints for one post.